Hey ladies, im new to this group. I just made a huge change in my life this last 2 month's. I went from being in a 2 yr relationship with a man that didnt appreciate me. I had to literally beg for his love and attention. Simple things like asking for help cleaning our home would turn into arguments. To him I was a nag and needy and a toy. He had cheated on me, didn't help me through a tough custody battle against my mother for my son, didn't emotionally support me, never gave me a chance to talk about my feelings without literally making me feel bad for saying anything cz he couldn't handle it. I left him and moved back to my home (phx) and im now in a relationship with someome i dated 4 yrs ago who makes me feel like im the most amazing beautiful woman in his world. Asking my ex why he loved me I got the reply becz your pretty and goofy and I love you laugh. Asking my new man he says because im strong. Every time he has seen me lose everything he has also seen me pick myself up and try again. He sees who I really am and I love him.
Also, I have an almost 3 yr old son. Hes autistic, has sensory disorder, developmentally delayed, and has torticollis. Constant therapy and he had a lot of needs. I went through a 1 yr custody battle against my mother. She took him in for me when he was 10 months old because I lost everything and i was a single mom of 19 yrs old and I had no where to go. My mother took him in for me. When I got it all together again i asked for him back and she said no. Well I recently signed my rights away and it was honestly the best decision I could have made for my son. I coparent with my mom and get a say in whats going on and I get to see him all the time and im still mom. But his gma and his uncle are his main family right now. He has amazed us all with how much he has done. Hes not recognizing colors and saying them. He couldny talk but he had his own way of communicating. And now hes actually saying colors! Honestly i am a good mom. My son is my world. Id do anything to see my boy smile and hear him laugh. But a mothers job is to do what is best for their babies and what is best for my baby is being taken care of by his grandmother because I am uncapable of helping him the way my mother has.
Also, my mother ans I have been working on being civil to each other. Not just for my son but for us. I love my mom and even with our horrible past we now talk on a daily and are very close. Shrs learned that instead of telling me what to do she just listens and understands and gives suggestions. And instead of telling my grandmother everything she keeps it between us. And ive learned that I need to stand up for myself respectfullu with her and be there for her too.
I also have started working out (i have always had a hard time gaining weight. Im 22 and weigh 98-100 pounds) now im a steady 100 and I feel sexy. I can look in the mirror now and love how i look. With or without makeup. I smile everyday for what I have and for who I have. And who i am.
Its hard to pull away from toxicity when you domt know its toxic and all u know is that your not happy. But once you do everything changes and its honestly amazing.
I hope any one that reads this takes my story to heart and does stuff to make them happy.